Gods been really showing me how to love and forgive. I still have trouble really forgiving someone who has done me wrong. i am not mad but i feel that there is this tension or that even though things are right between us, it just doesnt feel the same. Im not bitter, but i dont to put the effort in the friendship if she doesnt want to try either. but i guess its okay, maybe i am over analyzing everything. :) God please help me to love unconditionally and be very considerate.

Another thing i realized this quarter was just being judged? maybe its me or not, but i feel that i am judged often because i am in a relationship. everyone in my fellowship makes me feel like i am doing something wrong and that being in a relationship is a sin. i know they probably dont mean it, but the words they say makes me feel very distant from them. i am uncomfortable how some people view some of the fellowshippers as so godly so holy, but they dont see their flaws, yet they are here to point out most of mine. this has been on my heart, but i was finally able to talk to jon about this. and he feels the same way. this leads me to question again, is this fellowship the right one for me?

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE: Desiring God Conference this weekend was very interesting. I never heard any John Pipers sermons,and i really like him. His points were very convicting, especially his last part of the sermon. it made me realize that i should do not just Biblical things to glorify God, but in EVERYTHING i do it for God. Every little single thing you do, be satisfied in God. God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. I hope i can be very satisfy with what God has given me, There are so many things that i do not need. I am very blessed to live in a home, to have loving parents, to have basic clothes, and to even go to church and school, i want to be content in you God, help me be satisfied with the things you have given me <3